creatures of the loin discount mopeds ~~moped dealers to the stars~~ san francisco beware

6/6/6 - creaturesoftheloin.com enshrined for eternity as a historical archive document. everyone is still out there on the streets, find em if ya can.

5/27/06 -TOTALLY PSYCHO!

4/11/05 - the beauty, the disaster, the chaos...there is too much to tell, united; a belief we are perhaps having too much fun.

3/16/06 - Freedom Moped: How We Went From This To That On 100 Miles To The Gallon....our chicago brethren peddy cash in the tripwire.

3/12/06 rain snow hail argh, creatures ride through it all over the past week, benji finds a nice home with a fellow magnum rider in a dark alley, g and lee are, um, still stuck on an island in colombia awaiting a boat, and hoards of new mopeds make their way into the city under creature policy of importing every moped we can find into sf. if they aren't needed today, they will be tomorrow. splendid work.

3/08/06- a week of rain attempts to squelch creature activity but fails. g and lee are now stuck on a roadless island in colombia waiting a few weeks for a boat to the mainland. a mosquito from seattle makes a brief visit to creatureland. see the ringo photo archive for this week in creature pictures and a few from her rendevouz with g and lee in panama........

3/01/06- media blackout fails, we become a flavorpill feature in the last week of feb., issue #199 ---- as always my words mashed into some abomination.

THE MOD SQUAD: Creatures of the Loin

The Creatures of the Loin are the San Francisco division of Moped Army, a nationwide collective of moped gangs that ride around in search of interesting new locales and adventures. Though SF's Creatures was founded less than a year ago, it has rapidly become one of the largest such groups in the world, with 40 to 60 members, according to Benjamin "Benji" Broad, the Creatures' founder. "It's about rediscovering San Francisco," he says. "Riding around on streets no one has ever heard of, ending up on some street at two in the morning with your friends — that is beautiful."

hmm. uh. um. yes, its true this week we are mods, hmm. next week back to...lame

anyway lee and g are still stuck in panama...nyc, seattle, ukiah, & cincinnati moped gangs send ambassadors to meet with the creatures in sf. sept. rally planning starts.

2/15/06 - soma magazine publishes an article on creature theory in this months issue, creatures g & lee reach panama traveling 5000 miles in 35 days on single speed puch maxi 50cc mopeds...we send ringo on a mission to deliver points and speedo cables to central america. media blackout begins. to clarify: the creatures of the loin are complete losers. a few of them, the more unsavory ones, are homeless. they are around 22 years old on average with a healthy number still being high school misfits who get made fun of by even the nerds. they are about 40% girls and have chosen the moped way due to a love of liberation, a desire for self sufficiency, and because they are so cheap and worthless that $10 for a carb is a deal they will probably call a rip off. they make do with what they can, scavenging hunks of rust from the dirtpits and garages of the city for next to nothing and turning them into unreliable machines that will carry them throughout the city..perhaps. they plow their own way through the muck of life and are dedicated to being able to completely tear into their engines and rebuild mopeds in hours. they are fascinated with jetting, reed valves, panty hose air filters and such.... they have no problems with scooters or motorcycles or the people who ride them. they have many friends who ride things other than mopeds, however due to our worthless economic status, our scavenging moronic ways, our foolish youthful ideals and our desire to create our own obviously idiotic culture we have ended up on mopeds. there is beauty in being able to fix everything, and i do mean everything on your bike with 8/10/13/17mm sockets, a few screwdrivers, a spark plug tool, an adjustable wrench and a little patience. it is perhaps about scavenging, recycling, digging through the trash and making do with what you can find. there is no honor in it what so ever. i would know. leave it at that.

1/21/06 - the ringo photo archive, and there are some movies too...soon.

1/17/06 - g & lee reach ciudad obregon, which is here. their exploits can now be found at this fine location...XXXXXX meanwhile in sf the creatures launch a small scale invasion of treasure island in the post midnite hour with 20 creatures making the bay bridge crossing. 10 new riders appear, black magik again. rough draft of creature theory available, limited edition only.

01/11/06 - g & lee reach tempe, az 915 miles into the south american journey. 24 riders appear monday nite at naan and curry for evildoing including but not limited to : mclaren park taken, newport dislocating his shoulder, and a number of bikes dying along the way. photos appear documenting none of these events.

666 days in

read it now not later loinscum